Bilbo Baggins - Dragon Tamer
by linda.jenner
Summary: This was not what Bilbo expected when he signed on to burgle the dragon.


Bilbo's heart raced as he crept into the heart of the mountain. What in the name of Yavanna was he doing, trying to steal from a dragon? He was a Baggins not a burglar, but here he was, sneaking around corners and trying not to wake the beast.

The corridor opened out suddenly, into a huge space, it was bigger than the whole party field, no it was bigger, it was almost as big as Hobbiton, itself.

"Why, oh, why did I trust that mangy old wizard? Why did I listen to him? Why did I follow those disrespectful, uncivilised dwarrow? Why am I half way across the world? Why? _Why_? _**Why**_?" Bilbo moaned to himself.

"I don't know. But… do you want to play a game?" A voice asked.

Bilbo nearly screamed in shock.

"Who are you? Where are you?" He looked around but couldn't see anyone.

"I'm here." A small animal, no, a tiny animal, a tiny _**dragon**_ hung, upside down, from the door lintel above him. "I'm Smaug. Who are you?" It chirped, happily.

"Uh… I'm Bilbo…. Hold on… _**You're**_ Smaug? But, but, but you're supposed to be _**huge!**_ Why are you so small?"

"I'm small? Am I? _**Really**_? I'm small again?" The little dragon seemed delighted to be told that.

"Ah… Yes?"

"Oh, I always hoped to be small, again." The dragon wriggled in pleasure.

"You did?" Bilbo asked.

"Yes. Small means that the curse is broken and I found my nest and maybe even my nest chaperone."

"Okaay… curse? Did you say curse?"

"Yup. Curse. Morgoth cursed us, the dragons, those who followed him got killed one after the other, those that didn't, he cursed us, we wouldn't get back to normal size until we found our nest or nest chaperone. If I'm small again, then it means I found them."

"Right. When did you get small?"

"Just today, I think. I went to sleep last, as big me, see look." The little beast flung a wing out and pointed at the mounds of coin. The hobbit could clearly see the depression where something huge… Smaug… had rested under the coins, before he'd shrunk(?) or whatever had happened. "But I don't know how long ago that was. I woke up buried under what seemed like tons of gold and I had to dig my way out. Are you my chaperone?"

The change in topic threw Bilbo for a moment.

"I don't know."

"But you're here… and I'm small again." Like that was obvious.

"I'm not the only one here." Bilbo nearly smacked himself when he realised what he'd said.

"More? There's more people? Can I meet them? I never got to meet anyone when I came here, they were all too afraid of me because I was so big and angry."

"You want to meet them?" He what?

"Can I? Please? Can I?" The dragon let go of the lintel and fell to the ground. "Ow, that hurt." Tears filled the little animal's eyes and the bottom half of it's muzzle began to tremble. It was too much for Bilbo, he sank to his knees and reached for Smaug, scooping up the dragon he pulled it into his lap.

"Sh, sh, now, it's alright, you're okay. You're smaller now and the floors are hard, if you fall like that, it will hurt, so let's not do it again, okay?" He crooned until the dragon calmed down.

When the whimpers stopped and the trembling eased, Smaug lifted his head.

"Are we going to play a game?" The forlorn beast asked.

"A game? What sort of game?"

"I… I don't know. But there should games. Being little means games. Doesn't it?" The dragon looked at the hobbit beseechingly.

Games? Smaug wanted to play games? Bilbo's mind raced. Games. Games? Games with fauntlings he knew, games with animals, he didn't. but… Smaug spoke, so _**was**_ he an animal? Could Bilbo _**treat**_ him like a _**fauntling**_? It was worth a try.

"Alright… how about we play 'fetch'? would you like that?" He asked.

"Ooh, yes please… um… how do we play?"

"How?" Oh, stars Smaug didn't know how to play. Oh, well, he could work with that. "Well… I say the name of a thing or I describe a thing and you find it and bring it to me. Okay?"

"Yes, yes, yes. I can do that. Let's play, let's play. Please?"

Hmm, Thorin wants the Arkenstöne, Thranduil wants the starlight gems, Gandalf wants Thorin not to fall to gold-sickness, Fíli and Kíli want a home for their mother. Better to start with something less obvious.

"Hmm. Let's start with… find me… the Raven crown. It's a crown, black and gold and it's got birds on the front of it." That was the only description Thorin could give.

"Ooh, that's an easy one. Wait here." The dragon screamed and with a few running steps, he spread his wings and took flight.

He soared across the huge cavern before folding his wings and diving into the mountains of gold. When Bilbo realised what the dragon was doing, he screamed… and his scream brought the dwarrow running.

Thorin was first to his side followed quickly be Fíli and Kíli.

"Bilbo? Are you alright?" Thorin asked, his sword drawn ready for battle.

"Smaug! He'll be hurt, crushed. Oh, no what have I done?" The hobbit was nearly frantic.

"Smaug? Hurt? What do you mean?" Fíli asked.

"Found it! Here it is! I found it! What do I do with it, now, Bilbo?" Thorin heard what sounded like a child's voice.

"Smaug! Are you alright? Oh, come here, come here, let me see you." Bilbo pushed Thorin aside and a tiny dragon scrambled down the piles of gold until he reached the edge of the coins, there he began a three-legged, hopping run towards the hobbit. When Smaug reached Bilbo he flung himself into the hobbit's arms and proudly dropped the crown on the hobbit's lap. "Found it." He purred.

"Oh, Smaug, you scared me. I thought you were going to be hurt. Crushed, even."

"Oh, no, Bilbo, I didn't mean to scare you, not you, not ever. But gold and coins can never hurt me, I'm a dragon, we're meant to swim in them, that's why Aulë created us."

"Aulë created you? Dragons, I mean. Why?" Bilbo asked.

"Cause his dwarfses kept loosing things in their treasuries and their vaults. Aulë created us to find them, that's what we are, we're locators."

Thorin could only stare at the thing in Bilbo's arms. It looked like a dragon… but it's size? It wasn't much bigger than the kittens that Fíli and Kíli had played with in Bard's house in Laketown. He estimated that the creature's head was about the size of a hen's egg, it's body the thickness of a thick sausage and it was not much longer than the length of Orcrist, if that. And Bilbo thought _**this**_ was _**Smaug?**_

"Bilbo? Care to explain?" Balin was always the polite one.

"Just a moment, Balin. Smaug? Can you find me…?" Bilbo took a deep breath, this was either going to work or backfire badly. "Can you find me.. the cure for gold-sickness?"

"Gold-sickness? What's that?"

"Gold-sickness is where someone wants to hoard gold, keep it for themselves, not let anyone else near it. They will fight for it, fight over it, fight to get more of it."

"Oh. Um. Let me think… Oh! Oh, yes! I know where it is." The little ruby red creature climbed out of Bilbo's arms and bounded across the flagstone floor, only to throw himself into the air and beat his wings to gain height, one up high, he folded his wings and dove into the gold again.

"What in Mordor's going on, here, Bilbo?"

Bilbo quickly and distractedly explained to the dwarrow what had happed since he'd entered the Mountain. They looked at him like he'd lost his mind.

"Smaug? That's _**Smaug?"**_ Said Thorin.

"The chiefest and greatest calamity of our age? _**That**_ Smaug?" Fíli asked.

"The dragon that was over 200 feet long? _**That**_ Smaug?" Kíli asked.

"The one that breathed fire and burnt dale to a cinder? _**That**_ Smaug?" Thorin asked.

"It appears to be." Bilbo replied, still not really paying attention to the dwarrow.

Thorin and the dwarrow chattered and argued among themselves until the tiny, ruby red beast emerged from the mounds of gold, it carried a pouch in it's mouth. The dwarf-king watched the tiny beast clamber down the sides of the gold until is landed on an upside down shield. With the little beast's weight added to it, the shield began to slide, Smaug's claw's gripped the edges of the shield and held on as the shield slipped and slid down the coins and out onto the flagstones.

"Found it, Bilbo, I found it." The little dragon ran across to drop the pouch in the hobbit's lap, it then sat in front of the hobbit, a little like a dog. "More? Is there more to find? Please?"

Bilbo looked up at Thorin.

"Well? Do you want him to find things or not?"

Fíli and Kíli knelt down beside Bilbo. Since joining the Company, Bilbo had mothered and nagged the two brother indiscriminately, he'd taken one look at them and the lads had claimed a huge piece of the hobbit's heart and the feeling was definitely mutual. The hobbit was the only one that the two princes listened to now.

Thorin sighed, he knew if he wanted to keep his nephews –and heirs- he'd have to accept the hobbit and now it seemed he'd have to accept the dragon. At least the beast didn't take up much space anymore.

"The Arkenstöne?" He asked aloud.

"What's that?" Smaug asked.

"It's an oval shaped stone about this big," Thorin held his thumbs and forefingers to show the size of the stone, "and it glows from within with white and blue light."

"Oh, that thing. That's just over there." The dragon pointed and sure enough when Thorin looked, there it was glowing in the darkness. "What else? What else can I find?"

Bilbo looked at the princes leaning on him.

"What about the crown prince's coronet? Anyone know what that looks like?" Bilbo asked the dwarrow. There were lots of shaking heads and no answers, until…

"The royal coronets were all similar, they were all made to look like a crown of feathers. There was the crown prince's, the consort's and a few for the other princes and princesses." Balin answered.

"Don't forget the princess consort's, cousin, that was gold and silver. There should be… the Crown prince's one of black and gold, the Consort's one of black and silver, Princess Consort's, one of silver and gold and six of just silver for the other Princes and Princesses. Amad had sapphires put on mine and Dís' and Frerin had garnets on his." Thorin turned away from the Arkenstöne to correct Balin.

"Ooh. Um. That's going to take a bit of looking. Yay!" Smaug trotted over to Thorin, in his ungainly gait, he rubbed his head against the dwarf's leg. "I like you. Are there more things like this, things that are lost?" He looked up at Thorin with big pleading eyes.

"Ah… I'm sure I'll think of others." Thorin responded without really thinking about it, causing he other dwarrow to try and smother their laughter. Big eyes got to him every time, damn it!

"Yay!" The dragon cried and bounded into the gold again.

Thorin turned to Bilbo.

"You asked it to find you the cure for gold-sickness. What's in the pouch, burglar?"

"I don't know, yet. Let's look, shall we?" Bilbo opened the pouch and peeked inside, he dipped a hand into the pouch. "Seeds? Seeds? Seeds are the cure?"

"What type of seeds are they, Bilbo?" Fíli asked.

Bilbo studied them closely, putting a few on the palm of his hand he looked at them intently. "Athelas…" the dwarrow looked at him blankly. "Athelas is often know as kingsfoil in the Common tongue, but it's not a weed, no matter what Men tell you. It's used as a general heal-all, by the elves and by us hobbits. Every hobbit-home, smial or house has athelas under the windows. It was given to the first hobbits by Yavanna as a reminder of her and her husband, Mahal, it's usually used as an inhalant, we take the leaves and distil them to get the oils out and then we use a diffuser and heat the oil over a candle," he looked around the cavern, "a space this size… you'd need dozens, maybe hundreds of diffusers… or…. One large one in the centre of the chamber and a dozen plants in pots around the walls. Yes… that would work better." Bilbo muttered quietly to himself.

"But we only have seeds, Bilbo. How long does is take to grow this athelas?"

"Oh, I've got a phial of oil, we can use that to start with."

"How long until the treasury is safe Bilbo? How long will it take to grow from seed?"

"Seed? Oh, we don't need to worry about growing from seed just yet, there's plenty outside. The mountain is nearly covered in athelas plants. We'll only have to pot some, for in here. Pots are better, we can rotate them around so they won't suffer from being out of the sun."

"Can we help, Bilbo? Please?" Fíli asked.

"What do we need, Bilbo?" Kíli asked.

"You said pots. What sort of pots?" Thorin asked.

"Pots, nothing special, terracotta, stone, maybe?"

"Hmm… what about gold… or silver? Would that work?"

"Kíli?" Thorin asked.

"Well… it's just if the plants are going to be here in the treasury, shouldn't they look like they belong here? I mean, sure we can make stone ones, but there's got be heaps of pot or silver bowls or pots that we could use." Kíli explained.

"And we could get Smaug-y to find them for us, that would keep him happy… and occupied." Fíli added.

"Once we get the crystal skylights cleaned and working again, we can set up mirrors to reflect daylight down here and then the plants won't need to be moved as often."

"Dori? You know about plants?" Nori asked, stunned.

"I'm a tea merchant, nadad, of course I know something a bit about plants. No as much as Bilbo of course but a bit." Dori lectured his brother.

"That can wait a bit. Here… Smaug?" He called. "Can you come here for moment, please?"

Within seconds the dragon was sitting on the floor in front of the hobbit, squirming with curiosity.

"Right. Smaug can you find me something that looks like this." At this point Bilbo took a charcoal pencil from Ori and drew on the floor. He drew a series oil diifusers, all different, but all having the same basic components. "Some of these are one piece and some of them come apart. I need at least four complete ones, I don't care if they are one piece or two, but I need four of them. Can you find them for me, please?"

The dragon rubbed his head on Bilbo's knee and disappeared into the depths of the treasury again.

"For now? each of you take one of these." Bilbo held out a number of pieces of cloths, each with a single oil spot in the centre. "Dori? I need some pins, you can have them back in about an hour, I need you to pin one of these to everyone's shirt, high under their faces. The fumes and scent from the oil will rise and you'll breath them in, exactly the same as with an oil diffuser."

"Oh. Óin? Will that work?"

"Aye, that'll work real well.

"Alright. Let's get to it. Bilbo? You'll have to come out and show us what athelas looks like as a plant. We're not gardeners, but we'll do what you tell us." Thorin said as Smaug returned with the first diffuser.

Two days later, when Thranduil and Bard turned up to talk treaties with Thorin, they found just one dwarf on sentry at the gates.

"Dwarf, we have come to speak with Thorin Oakenshield, he who would be King Under The Mountain." Thranduil called pompously.

"Yep, we know. Thorin's in the treasury, cleaning crystals. He says just you two, you can bring two people each."

Bard and Thranduil looked at each other for a second or two. They both indicated who was to follow them and stepped forward.

"We are ready, dwarf."

"Right, then. This way." The dwarf turned and lead the way into the darkness, he stopped and picked up a lantern and with a scrap of a match, lit it. The pool of warm light lead the elves and the Men into the heart of the Mountain. It took a few minutes for them to reach the treasury.

"Thorin? Thranduil and Bard are here." The dwarf said. "Oi, Bofur? You're on watch, now."

"Thank you, Gloín." Thorin replied. "Send them over here, we're almost ready."

"Right ye are." Gloín pointed in the direction of a platform in the middle of the mountains of gold. "Over there." Then he walked away.

The elves and Men made their way across walkways and down stair to reach the platform. Bilbo turned an looked at the elves, with a considering face.

"Thranduil of Mirkwood?"

"I am. And who are you, Halfling?"

"He is Bilbo Baggins, Dragon Tamer, a hobbit. He is not half of anything." Thorin answered.

"Thorin." Bilbo argued. "Don't be silly. I didn't-"

"I know, but others don't and that's the simplest answer. Please?" The dwarf replied.

"Alright. For now. Thranduil? Who's the tallest of your elves?"

The question threw Thranduil for a second.

"I am… why?"

"Oh, good. See that there? There's some candles in there, will you light them please?" Bilbo asked as he pointed out the large oil diffuser to the elf-king. The king took the lit taper and applied the flame to the candles.

"Ah, thank you. Now, Thorin has asked me to be the mediator between Erebor and her neighbours. So let's to business, shall we?"

"Yes, Hobbit. I have come for what is mine. The White Gems of Lasgalen." Thranduil stated.

"Yes I thought that might be the case and I have just one question."

"What is it?"

"Do you know how many there were? It's just… we've only been here two days and a comprehensive inventory will take many weeks. And we should really get accommodations sorted first. So if you know how many gems there were, we'd have a better idea of how many we still have to find." Bilbo informed the elf-king.

Thranduil was startled again, but gather his thoughts quickly.

"There were 217 cut stones and 3 small raw clusters."

"Oh dear. Then we have a problem."

"And what sort of problem is that, hobbit?"

"Ah.. well… we've already found the completed commission, plus over 400 cut stones, nearly 100 small clusters, 40 large clusters and more than 500 uncut stones."

"Bilbo! I found some more." A piping voice called as a small winged creature landed next to Bilbo.

"More?"

"Uh-huh. I whole chest full. Fíli's bringing it. What next? What next? What can I find next?" The little creature asked.

"Next? Hmm… let me see…. Oh, find me 10 black opals the size of your head. How does that sound?"

Thorin's voice floated down to them.

"Bilbo? Can Smaug find me a cloak pin, it was about the size of a gold coin and it was in the shape of a bumblebee."

"Smaug?" Thranduil gasped.

"Yes?" The creature asked.

"You're Smaug?"

"Yes. Bilbo are they family?"

"No Smaug, but Thranduil and Bard are allies, so we'll be nice to them. Can you find Thorin's cloak pin?"

"Yep, yep, yep, but it's going to take me a while."

"That's fine, you go hunting, we'll still be here."

"Okay." The little dragon nuzzled the hobbit's hand and bounded to the edge of the platform and jumped off. One of the elves gasped and then sighed in relief as the tiny dragon became visible flying across the cavern.

"That was Smaug? The last of the fire drake? The last of the great dragons?"

"Yes.

"You shrunk the dragon!?" Thranduil gasped. "No wonder Oakenshield called you 'Dragon Tamer', if that's what you've done to the beast!"


End file.
